


bright.

by stardewmtns



Series: post-squip boyf riends [2]
Category: Be More Chill - Iconis/Tracz
Genre: Car rides, Fluff, JEREMY IS GOOD AT SINGING PLS MAKE THIS A HC, M/M, Romance, Singing, Song Lyrics, Songfic, also his inner monologue, angst if you squint, dabble, kind of?, mostly michael gushing about jeremy
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-07-14
Updated: 2017-07-14
Packaged: 2018-12-01 22:58:57
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,804
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11496537
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/stardewmtns/pseuds/stardewmtns
Summary: Michael and Jeremy have a morning routine. Michael picks Jeremy up at his house and they go to school together. One day, Michael discovers something about Jeremy that takes his breath away.aka Jeremy sings and Michael feels things





	bright.

**Author's Note:**

> i don't own this song nor it's lyrics. it's bright by echosmith!! laura dreyfuss and will connolly covered it so.. i thought this would be cute. enjoy!

Michael and Jeremy had developed a routine once Michael got his license and his car. Every morning, he would pick Jeremy up at his house and drive him to school. Sometimes, they would stop at 7/11, but only if Michael got there early. He followed this routine religiously; he’s never missed a day. It was convenient for both of them, since Jeremy’s house was on his way to school anyway, and Jeremy didn’t like to ride the bus. He told Michael that “a junior on the bus is killer weak” and “even if I did, who would I sit with? _Christine_?”. Michael was fine with it. He loved driving (even in his PT Cruiser), and he loved Jeremy, so… whatever made him the most comfortable. It worked for them. 

However, the couple minutes Michael did have alone in his car were blissful. Yes, he loved Jeremy, but driving was an escape for him. It was only second to getting high. Driving gave him time to think. It helped him cope with his anxiety, strangely enough. When he was driving, he felt in control. He loved the feeling. It made him feel like he had _some_ power. Michael didn’t have the luxury to be in control of anything else in his life. The things he couldn’t control outweigh the things he can. So, he loves driving. 

Plus, he can blast his music through the speakers and no one can say shit to him. 

Music was also an escape of his. He had his headphones with him at all times. If something became overwhelming, he could tune it out by putting on some Bob Marley. After fights with his parents or Jeremy, he would blast music through his headphones and forget everything that was happening around him. Sure, maybe he was just _ignoring_ his problems. In any case, the music still kept him calm and grounded. Three things he absolutely cannot live without: his car, his weed and his music. 

And, of course, Jeremy. 

There hasn’t been a dramatic change now that Jeremy and Michael are dating. They do the same things they’ve always done. Love hasn’t cured either of them. Jeremy is still traumatized, Michael still has anxiety. Jeremy is still uncomfortable with physical contact, and he still can hear the SQUIP. He tries his best to ignore it, but Michael knows how hard it is to block out a voice that constantly spits out shit in your head. Thankfully, he kept his promise about Mountain Dew Red, and stockpiled as many cases he could into his mini fridge. Thank God for his dealer at Spencer’s Gifts. 

Michael is grateful for the small things. He didn’t expect anything to change between them in the first place. Even so, he’s grateful for the tiny things that have. 

Now, Jeremy sits closer to Michael when they’re playing video games. He gives him these heart-melting half-smiles that send him over the moon. Sometimes, if Jeremy is feeling brave, he’ll lean into Michael and rest his head on his shoulder. A few times, they’ve held hands. Jeremy is always self-aware of how sweaty his palms are, and he’ll constantly apologize. Michael absolutely loves it though. With Jeremy’s warm, wet hands contrasted with Michael’s cold, calloused hands, he feels _there_ with Jeremy. He feels real. Since their confessions, they haven’t kissed, besides one kiss on the forehead. Michael is more than willing to take it slow. Jeremy is thankful for that. 

Today, Michael felt jittery as he drives into Jeremy’s driveway. Usually, they text all morning, but he didn’t get one single text while getting ready for school. His leg bounced erratically. His mind buzzed with thoughts. Today was not going to be a good day. At least, it wasn’t going to be a good ride to school. He could feel it. No texts from Jeremy wasn’t just , _unusual_ , it was practically _unheard of._

Jeremy came out of his house ten minutes later than he typically does. The SQUIP conditioned him to be extremely punctual, so Michael immediately knew what kind of day it would be. He felt his heart drop. _God dammit._

Jeremy slid into the car, eyes puffy and appearance disheveled. He didn’t speak a single word to Michael as he buckled himself in. He had headphones on. Michael could hear the music playing. Jeremy hardly even _glanced_ at Michael. There was nothing. He looked like a robot. The peach of Jeremy’s skin had turned into a light grey. His eyes were downcast, devoid of emotion. Michael grimaced. 

Depending on the day, you could get a very distant Jeremy or a very chatty one. Today was leaning towards very distant. More often than not, the reason he was like this was because of the SQUIP. Michael didn’t ask. He didn’t have to. When Jeremy wanted to talk, he would. 

The car was silent as Michael drove them to school. It was a ten minute drive, but without any noise, it felt like half an hour. Jeremy did nothing but rest his head on the passenger side window. Sometimes, non-verbal Jeremy pissed him off, because he could never tell what he was thinking. It sucked. He just wanted Jeremy to be in the _present_. He wanted him to be there. He wanted to talk to him, for him to be there for _him_. He wasn’t very reliable when it came to emotions, and that frustrated Michael the most. Michael has _always_ been there for Jeremy. Michael is there through _all_ of his panic attacks, his breakdowns, everything. When Michael has a down day, Jeremy helps him back on his feet, but whenever Michael experiences something even _remotely_ close to a panic attack, Jeremy completely shuts down. It’s like he’s not there. Michael goes through it alone. He wishes Jeremy could do the same for him as he does for Jeremy. He wants Jeremy to protect him. He wants him to notice he’s there. 

Michael doesn’t _expect_ anything of Jeremy. He knows the difficulties Jeremy is going through, and despite everything, Jeremy does _try_ to support Michael. He can’t blame him for being emotionally detached when Michael breaks down. He just wants to know why. And he hardly receives any answers from Jeremy. Partially because he’s too afraid to ask. 

Before Michael can be swallowed by his thoughts, he hears something that sounds vaguely like a word. His grip tightens on the steering wheel. His brow furrows. _Did Jeremy say something?_ , he wonders, side-eyeing his boyfriend. He starts to mouth _“What?”_ when he’s stopping by a sound. It’s quiet, muffled by Jeremy’s sleeve, but Michael hears it. 

Singing? 

Something as minuscule as the sound of the tires slapping down on the hard pavement would drown out the noise. It was meant to be unheard but Jesus, Michael wanted it to hear it. He’s never heard Jeremy sing. He’s never done anything to indicate that he was the slightest bit musically inclined. In first grade when they had to sing in a school concert, Jeremy cried until his mom promised she would keep him home. He knew he could (kind of) act, but sing? It never crossed his mind. 

Jeremy’s eyes were closed. He didn’t really seem to notice he was singing. He would have looked like he was sleeping if it wasn’t for the muffled melodies coming from his mouth. 

“I think the universe is on my side,” he sung, softly. “Heaven and Earth have finally aligned… days are good, and that’s the way it should be…” 

Michael has never heard something so beautiful. He almost went through a stop sign, too enamored by the way Jeremy swings his notes and sighs during rests. It was gentle and raw. Christ, even if Jeremy sounded horrible and tone deaf Michael would still swoon. This boy was going to kill him. He can’t believe he hasn’t already. 

Jeremy’s voice felt weightless. He didn’t sing through his nose, he sang through his chest. There was no nasal sound in his tone. It’s not _angelic_ or anything, but to Michael, it’s as perfect as perfect can be. There’s something about listening to Jeremy sing a love song that makes everything inside Michael buzz with warmth. His voice was so _Jeremy_. It was unique in a way that only Michael could describe.

“Did you see that shooting star tonight? Were you dazzled by the same constellation? Did you and Jupiter conspire to get me? I think you and the moon and Neptune got it right…” during the chorus, Jeremy’s voice got louder. He still muffled his singing with his sleeve, but now Michael could clearly hear the words he was dancing around. Michael felt a shudder go through him, and he desperately hoped Jeremy got louder on purpose. He hoped that Jeremy wanted him to listen. 

\--- 

By the time they got to school, Jeremy had fallen silent again. Presumably, the song had ended. Michael couldn’t help but feel like something… miraculous just occurred? He had this strange feeling go through him---his whole body was humming. The tips of his toes were tingling. His throat closed up. His stomach felt like it had wrung itself dry. He felt fucking incredible. 

As Michael pulls into the closest parking spot to the school, Jeremy already has his seat-belt unlocked and looked as if he was going to jump out as soon as the car was in park. Michael, defiantly, grabs a hold of Jeremy’s wrist before he could do so. Jeremy visibly freezes. Michael momentarily panics, because he didn’t exactly plan this out, but is able to chill-ly improvise: “Hey, that song. What’s it called?”

Jeremy chews on the inside of his cheek. He doesn’t turn his head to face Michael. Instead, he looks at him through his peripheral vision. “Uh.. it’s called Bright. By Echosmith. I don’t---I don’t listen to them, this was just---”

“Your voice. It was really good. That song sounds like it was made for you,” Michael smiles warmly. 

Although Michael can’t see most of his face, he could tell Jeremy was blushing. Jeremy huffs. “Sure, dude. Can we go now? I’m going to be late for class,” he grumbles, shaking out of Michael’s grip. He snickers. They had at least ten minutes before class started. “Uh-huh, totally. But Jeremy?” He chews on the name _Jeremy_ , adding a light harmony to it. Jeremy groans, opening the door a sliver. “What?” he huffs, annoyed. Michael’s mouth splits into a shit-eating grin. 

“I love you, dude.”

“J-Jesus, Michael! God, I-I love you too! Now let’s _go_!” Jeremy fumbles, slamming the car door and scuffling towards the school building. 

Michael laughs, catching up to trail behind Jeremy. 

Another thing on Michael’s ‘can’t-live-without’ list: Jeremy’s singing.

Maybe he can get him to sing _Is This Love_ by Bob Marley. 

The thought makes him laugh harder.

**Author's Note:**

> i've been thinking about this idea forever so i HAD to write it before i died. i Needed it. Also this is considerably shorter than my previous fic, but i’m considering these to be dabbles. hopefully i’ll get back up to 9+ pages. i haven’t looked through this at All so if there's any errors i'm sorry!!! i might go back through and edit what i need to.
> 
> also i want to make chillly a word. not chilly. chillly.
> 
> suggestions are cool!!!!!!!! comments and kudos are too!! pls give me ideas for future works, i need ideas to fuel the boyf riends fire.


End file.
